• @aseriesoftubes@lemmy.world
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    1923 months ago

    “Who is the first buyer?” one of the reporters asked.

    “Me,” Trump quipped.

    “The second?” the reporter pushed on.

    “I don’t know, but I’m the first buyer. It’ll be out in … less than two weeks. Pretty exciting, right?” the president asked.

    First of all, why would he be the first buyer of an express residency card when he’s already a citizen? Fucking moron.

    Second, “it’s happening in two weeks” is Trumpspeak for “it’s literally never going to happen.”

    • sp3ctr4l
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      3 months ago

      Residual salesman brain.

      Trump: I am awesome, I bought this thing, it is awesome, you will be awesome if you buy it too.

      It bears no relationship to … making any kind of sense, because it is literally a hustle, a psychological manipulation tactic.

      He is just saying salesman words, meant to encourage buy in.

      Has no relation to reality, the truth, making sense, etc.

      … But, it works on rubes, dullard marks, cult members, weak willed / low self esteem people with decent reliability.

      These are just more Trump University or Trump Steaks to him.

      • @ripcord@lemmy.world
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        133 months ago

        He’s not faking being a citizen. He’s faking being self-aware. He barely has a clue wtf he’s talking about at any given time. That’s all.

    • don
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      253 months ago

      Why would the president of the United States even need to or care about buying his own residency card?

      In case he accidentally revokes it, because he’s a senile fucking moron.

      • @sporkler@lemmy.world
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        93 months ago

        He could wake up tomorrow in a Venezuelan prison form ‘accidently’ being deported, since he made it so that’s a thing now

      • @ExtantHuman@lemm.ee
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        43 months ago

        To sell it later because he thinks it’ll be a collector’s item. His only thoughts are ever about making money.

    • @blarth@thelemmy.club
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      103 months ago

      So law and order is just bullshit now right? You buy a gold fucking stupid ass card with dear leader’s picture on it and you get to skip the line? Where is that money going by the way, to Trump or a public fund?

    • @tomi000@lemmy.world
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      73 months ago

      “24h” was equivalent to “maybe during this term”, so 2 weeks could mean within the next 2 decades

    • bean
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      63 months ago

      Well, my first thought was that he did it to cover Melania 😂