It depends on your strategy, and the amount of effort you’re willing to put in. I’ll talk to guys who tell me they found no success on dating sites, but when I ask them about it, they’ll talk about their experience as if all they did was send a “hey” DM to every girl on the site. The quantity-over-quality approach just doesn’t work, since girls are already getting an overwhelming amount of messages, and something generic just gets lost in the noise.

When I decided to bite the bullet and do online dating, I got cleaned up nice, planned a few events with friends to get nice, active, up-to-date pictures, made a well-thought-out profile, and spent a couple hours every day reading through the profiles of potential matches. I’d only contact the ones I not only liked, but that I felt might like me as well based on their profile. I’d find something I wanted to talk to them about, and make a personalized DM for each one that could serve as a good conversation starter.

It took a few months, but I eventually found a partner - we’ve been together for 8 years, married for 3. I’m not sure how much of my experience was luck, but my wife tells me that a lot of what interested her in me as a match on the site was my profile responses, interesting pictures, and unique DM topic, so the effort definitely made a difference.

You can meet interesting people, but ultimately it’s based on superficial connections.

Typically, the cis woman experience is about filtering, while the cis man experience is about casting as wide of a net as possible.

You could potentially have a dick-pic free experience if you’re able to curate and filter enough, but be prepared for an exhausting or donging experience.