- cross-posted to:
- memes@sopuli.xyz
- cross-posted to:
- memes@sopuli.xyz
cross-posted from: https://lazysoci.al/post/27615443
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Some of the comments here have to be astroturfing. I can’t believe that real people would rather be in an office with colleagues than have more time for friends and family.
I’m currently 100% remote, and to be honest I do sometimes miss having coworkers to shoot the shit with, and there absolutely are practical drawbacks to being remote – especially if you are the one remote worker on a team that is at least partially in office together. At least for me the benefits of being home all the time do outweigh that, on balance, but I’d be lying if I told you that I felt that I was as well-integrated with the rest of my teams as I could be, or that being just a voice and/or face in a video call doesn’t have some amount of impact on my long-term prospects.
That said, I really only miss a small handful of my in-office coworkers, and we still do make a point of grabbing lunch every month or three. The rest of the in-office experience can stuff it.
Ideally work would have friendly interactions.
This just in, Lemmy shocked that people have varying opinions
I did know someone like that during the pandemic. He basically hated his wife and kids.
Sounds like a him problem.
The assumption here is that they have friends and family they want to interact with. It’s lonely when you have no one and working in the office means that you get to socialize and have the potential to do things after work because you’re already dressed/out.
Lol, friends and family? I spend all my time alone in a box, I miss being around people in the office
I work at home Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. In the office Tuesday and Thursday and this works for me, as if I go all week at home my mood plummets, seems I like some human contact in the week.
At weekends I see friends and family.
My experience has been similar. I work in the office 1-2 days a week and it’s just the right amount for me. More than that, I start getting frustrated with the commute. Less than that, my mood plummets very quickly.
Hybrid working has been the best for me.
Exactly the same for me really. My commute is a 1 hour 45 minute drive each way. These days I go climbing through as it’s 20 miles from home but in the way back from work.
I had car trouble for 14 months and my commute was closer to 3 hours on the tram, train, and a 20 minute walk before the tram and after the train.
Especially lemmy users of all people
I agree that WFH is far more efficient and a better situation for most office-based workers, but I wouldn’t call going “multiple days without speaking to another human being” an upside. My issue with office work is I have to get up early and get myself ready and fight through traffic, not that I have to interact with other people even if I don’t like some of them.
I think that’s a regressive point of view. I’m skeptical of anyone with a platform that pushes it, and somewhat repulsed by the normal people that repeat it. Naturally, I think. You don’t like people? Well, I’m a people… You’re a people too. All of us are people. Good people, whatever your idea of a bad person is, we all are people and we people are social creatures.
In a healthy society we should want to be around other people and, in fact, as a group we become more accepting of individual differences by encountering and interacting with numerous and diverse groups of people and accepting them into our norm, seeing first-hand that we are all just normal people going through life and striving for what we believe is good. We people add so much more than we threaten, we are capable of great and profound things when we work together to achieve them.
It’s not normal to turn your nose up at that and I hate that it is being normalized.
I really don’t get the “WFH = antisocial” angle. I have friends, I have a partner, I leave the house and go to social places. I don’t rely on my workplace to provide for my social needs.
Before working from home I ran a small factory where much of the time I was the only person on the premises. I didn’t have the time or energy to do much socialising when I worked there. My social life became richer when I stopped and worked from my dining room!
Did we read the same post? The one I read said it was good to not interact with another human being for days on end.
Thanks for letting me know your anecdotal experience though. Mine does not at all look like that but it sure sounds nice. congratulations I guess?
We did, however you, unlike me, managed to retain the wording of it.
That’s what I get for replying to stuff during a work meeting!
Some people believe “Hell is other people”.
Others believe “Hell is lack of other people”.
As much as people act like they don’t need contact with other humans, it has been shown to be absolutely necessary for mental health and brain health.
Yeah, but you can get that outside of an office with people you actually enjoy being with.
That is not what I am saying, what I am referencing is her saying you can go days without human contact. Implying she doesn’t hangout with anyone.
That was two days ago. Let it go. Nobody cares anymore.
This x100. I get along with the people I work with but at the end of the day I can’t wait to get away from them. Whereas I still catch up with friends outside of work regardless. Given the option of only socialising with friends and family that’s a no brainer for me.
Speak for yourself. It highly depends on what people you are talking to and the quality of those relationships. IDGAF about anybody at work and could go my entire life without speaking to them again.
I thought the same but over the years my perspective has changed. It’s not actually healthy to think like that about people you spend a third of your time with
Doesn’t help the fact that we are faced with the threat of systemic violence if we do not maintain a job and are thus forced to spend a third of our time somewhere we don’t want to be in the first place.
Forced interaction will never be healthy interaction.
Yeah, that’s for sure. I’m a FIRE adherent so hopefully I am going to be able to choose where I spend my time soon and escape the broken system
I’m civil at work but once I leave the job odds are I will never speak to those people again. Coworkers are not friends, for the most part. There’s maybe a handful of people from previous jobs that I still talk to.
Basically same.
I get that science shows that most people need a certain baseline level of socialization to be happy and mentally well.
… but I think that assumes said interaction is … casual or friendly, in a third place, or with someone you trust, and doesn’t require or involve a monetary cost or gain as part of the interaction.
Thats getting to be near impossible to do on a regular basis in the US, certainly in person, even online or via phone as well.
Myself?
Autistic with CPTSD from being surrounded by narcissist hypocrite, various kinds of mentally unstable people my whole life, now finally far away from them.
Lemmy is about all the socializing I need, and I am so, so less stressed and baseline happy now that I no longer need to solve idiots problems for them, be constantly infantilized by people who are objectively less emotionally stable, worse at managing money, and usually less informed/intelligent than me.
Exactly, which is why I appreciate wfh so much, because the reduced commute time means I’ve had more time to establish a healthy long term social life which will last beyond my current contract. I also appreciate the extra time I get to spend with my loved ones, which, as you rightly point out, is very important for mental health. Mandatory return to office ruins all of this, and taking into consideration what you said, should really be considered a threat to public health and wellbeing.
I do agree with you that work from home is nice. I am not commenting on that what I am commenting on is that according to her the best bit is total social isolation. Because the way she wrote the tweet implies she stays at home alone with no contact to the outside world.
As much as people act like they don’t need contact with other humans
They get it elsewhere like a real social life outside work.
Seriously, all these people saying they have no human contact unless they go into the office is truly horrible to hear.
And, honestly, probably isn’t their fault; depending where they live, it might be incredibly difficult to find a local community that they would be interested in with how spread out and isolated cities have been built to be.
It’s all just so depressing that we have a society that has relegated most people to have their entire life revolve around their job. Nothing but work and back home to prep for work tomorrow.
At least for me its not “i get no social contact outside of the office” (i have a very active social life with things to do basically every single night), its more " i just dont want to spend 1/4 of my week not socializing.
It’s nice to have little non-work related conversations. It breaks up the BS.
I speak to another human daily when I go get some bread at the corner.
Yeaaaaa, it’s fucked me up bad
In one of his Sherlock Holmes stories, Sir Arthur Conan Doyle makes a reference to the effect of being alone on someone like Newton versus someone like Beau Brummel. Unfortunately, it seems there are too few Newtons and too many Brummels in the world.
I’m currently 100% remote, and to be honest I do sometimes miss having to spend 2-3 hours of my day getting ready/up early and going to work, spending the extra gas money, being late. Cause if we don’t go to the office, WHO WILL FUND ALL THESE CORPORATE LOANS? /s
I moved to where I lived so I could walk to work. 6 months later the pandemic hit and I more or less spent 80-90% of the past 5 years alone in my apartment. I miss working in the office because I miss just being able to talk to close coworkers/friends, no slack, no zoom, just walking over and if they weren’t focused chatting or discussing and just having social interaction
Fuck, I miss the walk to work and interacting with people
There was lots of shitty stuff about working in the office but damn I do miss it
Only time in my adult life I managed to be regularly hygenic tbh
I miss just being able to talk to close coworkers/friends, no slack, no zoom, just walking over and if they weren’t focused chatting or discussing and just having social interaction
Have you considered getting a social life?
Have you considered that that might be difficult with antisocial attitudes like the one expressed by OOP becoming the norm?
Nah, it’s not about to be the norm: people just vary in their social disposition with some wanting none of it. That’s fine & should be accepted. Have you looked at society?
Yeah, I have, and I think being fearful and avoidant of each other is more destructive than it is helpful. Have you looked at the up and coming generations, taken seriously the loneliness they are expressing, and acknowledged how that might affect their views on the world and how they treat others?
All social interactions aren’t equal. When I go to a shop I avoid people because I am not in that space to socialise. However when I go to a social event I try my best to be outgoing and engage with lots of people.
The OOP reads like all social interactions are equally bad, so I’m not really sure why you’re disagreeing with me for disagreeing with the original post. I did not say anything to the contrary of what you are saying.
Stop uisng creditcards (if you even still use them) and stop buying from mega corps, that will have a way bigger impact than you going to work. Heck generally staff working from home is cheaper if the production is the same.
Also, you can walk bike or take the public transport to work unless you live in a corrupted hellscape.
Anyone else notice the weird (possibly AI?) upscaling on this picture?
Yes, downsides like drinking better coffee and doing laundry and other chores during the lull of the day.
Good coffee is a major perk. Work from home haters always bring up how important it is to socialise during “coffee breaks” but how enjoyable is it to drink that burnt ass-taste budget watery joe while repeating “nice weather” to random people?
Precisely.
For me, over the years having no connection with anyone at work has actually been detrimental and led me to seek an in office job.
It wasn’t the only factor but it was definitely one of them. Humans are social creatures at the end of the day.
Hey friend, I get you. People don’t need to agree with you, but I think it’s wild the number of downvotes you receive for simply stating your own personal desires.
I work at a job where I’m not expected to be in the office. But we still go, based on personal preferences. There are some people who never go, and that’s totally accepted. And others, who prefer the separation of work and home, and being around people, and that’s okay too.
To me, our current arrangements of hybrid work, as you feel, is fantastic. (Working way more than we need to, just to feed the owner classes notwithstanding)
clown shit lol get a damn social hobby outside of work
I’ll just kms instead, it’s easier
I don’t need work to be social. Sounds like a skill issue to me.
You don’t necessarily need it, but if you have a full time job that’s roughly a third of your time. Having a third of your time without social interaction causes you to need an extremely robust social life outside of work to make up for it, throwing things off balance.
I don’t think it has much to do with skill, I just wanted more balance in my life
Don’t worry, you’ll be spending plenty of time talking to humans through countless pointless meetings. Sure, it won’t be physically face-to-face, but it often isn’t physically face-to-face even when you have to go to the office anyway.
This meeting could have been not a meeting.
Not to mention being in the thick of office politics.
The only times I didn’t loathe office time was when I had zero time commitment to be actually in the office.
Go in, get keys, go into field for 7.5-9 hours, return, drop off keys, head home.
Sometimes I would leave or return early and discuss matters with coworkers in passing. But anything important was done by e-mail so it didn’t matter.
When my butt in a cubicle seat became the only metric (and a synonym for) working, it was awful.
While moving into my current house, my family spent a lot of time at the old house prepping things while I maintained occupancy of the new house, so of course I was here alone most of the time. I do work from home. I specifically chose this house because, among other reasons, there are no neighbors near enough to encounter by accident. I don’t really go anywhere on a regular basis. As a result, most days the first time I spoke was at my morning meeting; on many occasions it was the last, too. Even better, I was having sinus issues, so until I opened my mouth I was never sure my voice would be there, let alone how it would sound. (Once or twice I did say a few test words to myself to make sure I could be heard.)
There are a lot of things I miss about those times, but I’m much happier now with my family here. I remember that, when we all came up together to buy the house, my kid had left a little rubber dinosaur on the back of one of the toilets, so I saw it every time I used the facilities. It was the first time I’d spent any significant amount of time away from my kid since they’d been born and I was stunned by how much emotion such a simple reminder of their existence elicited.
I still don’t really talk to anyone else, though.
being able to stay with family and friends is such a blessing
Used to WFH and to be honest I missed the office at the time. Every now and then I’d show up in the office and get zero work done because I’d catch up with everyone lol
It’s nice to have the option for both. Sometimes the slog of driving there is too much.
I think work from home should be the norm and people who oppose it are just your managers who don’t want to be obsolete, but I worked from home for 4 years from 2008-2012, before it was more common, and I basically drove myself crazy with loneliness and feeling out of the loop. This was partially due to bad circumstances personally, but after a few months of just your pyjamas you start to feel really sloppy and desperate.
I should add this was long before Zoom or any video meetings so that didn’t help.
It’s not for everyone, and I know what you’re saying but “feeling sloppy and desperate” is certainly not a universal experience. As a single anecdotal example, I’ve been working from home for over 5 years now and personally feel like I get a lot more pros than cons from it. Sure, I’m lazier with my personal hygiene and don’t bother to dress up (during the working day when it’s only me who can smell me), but I still go outside and go to events and talk to people outside of work, I just have more energy left to do that in my evenings and weekends now 🤷
I am not against working from home I just prefer working with my colleagues in the office
How can you work from home?
Like, for me its way too distracting, so I would totally loose myself between playing video games, browsing lemmy, and wanking
You just work inbetween those activities. In total you’d still get more done than at the office.
People never shut up at the office. I’ve seen multiple people do absolutely nothing but converse and distract others from working. I get plenty of social interaction from my relationship, friends, and family. I don’t need it from work too.
We would have social butterflies make stops around people’s cubes to catch up on gossip during work hours all the time.
It starts out with an audible “Did you get my email?…” then 45 minutes of whispering then “Thanks, let me know what you think about the email…” then back to their desk. Rinse then repeat all day. Occasionally sure but it’s every day pretty much. Don’t miss it one bit.
Really depends on the work you do and your personality. For me being in the office makes it difficult to concentrate due to conversations going on around me. It’s great for information gathering, but as soon as I need to do some deep thinking, it becomes a lot more challenging. Plus it’s a lot less comfortable and I have to deal with the commute, taking up some of my energy before I even get into the office
That sounds like a self control issue on your end, not a general truth about humans
Not sure why you’re being downvoted, it’s a genuine question.
Just make sure that you have a dedicated space for working somewhere in your home. If you just work wherever or in the same places your brain is geared for play or rest, it’ll be next to impossible to get anything done.
Some people need the setting change, many others do not. I am far less distracted by home stuff than all the office distractions like other people yapping about sports and other things I don’t care about. It is about staying on task, which is also necessary in a work environment.
Having a good work space helps. I already have a gaming setup and I just added a docking station for my work laptop and switch the monitors over for it to become a work space.
Some people I work with go into the office every day because they need that separation, especially if they don’t have dedicated space for working or live with people who don’t leave them alone. I do hybrid so split between the two and I find it to be the most effective since there are some in person discussions that make things go smoother and then on the days at home I can do the solo work in a more comfortable setting with fewer distractions. Sometimes I have to close the door to keep family out, but in the office I don’t even have a door…
Connect to the VPN and start working. It’s not difficult.
Is that you peeking into my bedroom?
I think it depends on the job. I currently have a WFH job which is essentially call center tech support, and I barely have time to shit. It’s basically full throttle the moment I punch in until I punch out. It leaves me with 0 time to be distracted. I could potentially see myself getting into bad habits if I had a position that had ample down time/projects over a long time frame.
For people prone to distraction it helps to designate a work space at home. Preferably a separate room, but it could be as simple as a desk in the corner. You then follow the same routine you would going into the office except your commute is just walking to your work space.
Just as important, you need to ignore that space when you’re off the clock. That way you can have a definite separation of work mode and home mode.
If you have a traditional house with a basement, that’s very doable. People living in apartments, not so easy.
If nothing else you can just pick a corner and hang a blanket. I’ve got my desk next to the window in the living room.
I never thought of wanking. I could stay away from video games, no problem. Browsing would stay at a minimum. But wanking…I’d do it every time I’d become just a bit stressed. 10/10 would hurt myself.
Presenting yourself as an antisocial it’s the perfect recipe for being able to provide for yourself.
I mean who wouldn’t want to BE around, be attended by and work in sensitive, multiple people and teams dependent, expensive projects that provide services and goods to OTHER HUMAN BEINGS with someone that publicly states to be a misanthrope and who derives JOY from actively NOT being around others
SERIOUSLY, what’s not to like?
Nah, you don’t need to be all that sociable to work effectively with your team & get technical shit done. Sometimes presenting a standoffish veneer outside your team can be useful to ward off timewasting bullshit from overpaid illiterates outside your team who would save everyone time if they just read.
I think the sensible answer lies as a combination of these things.
It’s true, you don’t need to be friends with your coworkers to get stuff done, and it ought not be expected of you.†
It’s also true that dealing with other people can be exhausting at times.
But I think what the original commenter is pushing back against this notion that being around others is just terrible. We are social creatures, after all. For the vast majority of people, SOME social interaction with other humans is necessary for mental health. What that looks like is different for everyone.
But, really, this is an internet joke, and I don’t think OOP means it literally.
† Though personally, not being friendly in small moments at work would be death for me. I give up half my waking hours during the week, sometimes more, for the shareholders, and to afford to live. If I can’t get some small social interaction during these hours I would die.
Only done about 8 days in the office in my life as I didn’t work in an office role until after the lockdowns started. Not in any rush to do any more tbh, the commute is expensive and takes ages just to get less work done than I would at home and I can’t even do anything interesting in my unpaid lunch break as I am still at the office.
At least in my last non office role lunch break was paid time still so I usually just took as long as it took to eat something and then got back on with what ever I was doing. Although there was also more job satisfaction there as customers were normal people rather than faceless corporations.
